Yes, thats right, we are now in Cambodia! Ha ha i kid, Vietnam actually. Get it? You know, from the film with Robin Williams? Where his screaming and shouting and running around with a gun killing people? Thats right, Patch Adams.
Anyway, after a lull in available technology that allows us to connect with the 21st Century, i am now out of villages covered in dust and chicken, and now in the prosperous and highly communist counntry of Vietnam. Thats right, COMMUNIST. Upon entry, i was advised i should never write either 'Journalist' or 'Writer' for my profession when entering any asian country. They no likee the writers apparently. Well, to be honest, if i put either down it would have been a lie anyway HAHHAHAHAHAAHahhhhaaa...*sob* Anyway, just as a warning, if this blog suddnely starts sounding strange with my normal writing style turning to a more serious and un-cragg like tone, for example...
'Well, today i was walking along and a big poo came out...SORRY, MY ENGLISH COMPANSIONSHIPS, I AM LONGER NO ALLOWED TO SPEAK OF MY JOURNEY. PLEASE BE FOND OF MY MEMORY AND AWAIT MY RETURN WITH NO QUESTIONS. YES I AM GOOD AND THERE ARE NO JAIL AND ONLY SMILES. THANK YOU AND HELLO.'
You will then know it is time to send over the troops. Anyway, on with the normal twitterings...
So, last time we spoke we were in the lovely little town of Viang Vieng. My GOD what a strange little place that was. Laos, in general has been lovely. Like Thailand, the people are beautiful and so friendly you wanna hug them and put them in your pocket then lock them in a glass box and shake it to make them say nice things to you everymorning. The country was, howevere, a lot less developed than Thailand, which makes sense i guess, coz really, who's ever heard of Laos? Anyone? Dust? Most people on the trip are so unaware of it that they keep calling it 'Lay-ose' to the locals horror. Anyway, after the wonder that was Luang Prabang, a charming little town full of crap internet places but wonderful shops and food places (We found somewhere that sells sandwiches. SANDWICHES AND QUICHE! My god i lost control and killed about two people fighting my way to the quiche) we made our way via a hugely gigantically bumby and terrifying bus journey up several mountains to the town of Viang Vieng. Very small, and very dusty with chickens cats and dogs running everywhere, this was a place designed for backpackers. Restaurants only sold pizza, burgers and pasta, long gone were the sights of leaves and rice. All the restuarnts oddly enough had giant TVs that only ever showed Friends and Simpsons episodes which was wonderful and scary at the same time. Dozens of glazed-eyed westerners would sit in these places, staring open mouthed, never talking. Im sure we saw the same ones in there for days. Anyway, after spending a day floating down a river on a tubing related bar crawl, i now understand these glazed, dead eyes. I havent been so drunk, and in so much danger in quite a many years.
Let me explain the premise - Walk to the rental shop, sign an agreement that basically says your death is your own fault, grab a HUGE rubber tube (inside of a tractor wheel by the loosk of things) then jump in a tuk tuk where it will take you and your pals to the top of the river, upon which you enter a bar, drink till you blind, then float down the river and repeat at each following 5 bars until you reach the final one floating face down, bloated with beer, scorched by the sun and naked in the urine soaked river.
Sounds good huh? I make it sound a lot worse than it is as you can imagine, but this is basically the jist. The unfortunate/amazing addition to this strange outing, is the fact that at each of the 6 bars, there is either a water slide made of bathroom tiles and old toothbrushes, and zip lines that let you jump from a platform into the incredibly shallow depths of the river. On the day we went, two people cracked their skulls open, one person broke their foot and countless others cut and hurt themselves. Including us. its amazing really, the first zip line, we avoided, because as we estimated, upon entering the river, it was as deep as puddle. i floated down stream, scowering my body on the river bed. It was not a deep river. however, after our second BUCKET of Gin & Tonic (at 12.45 in the noon might i add) none of us really cared about shallow water, toothbrush slides etc. We just wanted to have fun! But, we aren;t idiots, so even though we were still stupidly drunk, we avoided the certain death slides and had tremendous fun! The day basically consisted of, being very drunk, jumping into the river with tremendous speed and force made easier by the alchohol, floating down the river and losing BOTH flip flops as they do not make good paddles, arriving at the next bar and immediatly being handed a shot of Laos whickey (brewed with snakes. Oh yes, check out the flickr photos in the next couple of days) and then jumping into the river some more. By the time we reached the 4th bar, it was 2.45 and i was so drunk i could see through time. I lay, beached on the decking with a bucket on my head. Jo on the other hand, held it together tremendously well and managed to continue to act like a human being. I sadly, did not. After what seemed like a blurry eternity of scorching heat and crap euro pop music, we ended up at the final bar. And there, stood, teetering above the shack opf a bar, stood the uber slide. The UBER slide made from really posh bathroom tiles! I decide its great, the best and most fun thing i have EVA seen and instantly jump off my tube and run to the top and get on it squeeling like a pig girl. It wasnt until i was zooming down it at terminal velocity, that i realised several things.
1. Its very, very, high.
2. Its incomplete and finished mid air with a jaunty ramp.
3. im so drunk im going down it backwards.
4. Oh god im falling.
It was so high! I shot into the water with such a look of fear/adrenaline/joy on my drunken face, that the water smashed my mouth shut chipping both my front teeth. Luckily, no one can see the chips, i can just feel them and its very annoying for my nosey tongue. It wasnt until i spent the next hour climbing out of the water (I swam in circles, spluttering, gasping, grabbing other slide victims as bouyancy aids till i reached the shoreline) that someone utterd the follwoing words to me that sealed the fact i shall not ride the slide of doom again.
"Did you hear? Someone had their nipples ripped off on that the other day?"
so, nipples in tact, we decided to end our day of drunken, wet horror at about 6 and headed downstream to the drop off point to return home. I arrived back at our quaint little hotel soacked, bruised, bleeding, shoeless and full of joy. It wasnt until the next morning at 10 am that i realised i was in fact drunk the entire night when we witnessed the aftermath of the mess we had made in our room. So, that was Vieng Viang in Laos, highly reccommended for the insane.
After recovering from a 48 hour long hangover, we made our way to Laos capitol city, Vientianne. Incredibly boring, dull and dusty, there actually isnt much to say about this place as the rest of Laos has proven to be way more superior. Except this place DID have a swimming pool. And my GOD it was lovely. Oh, and sadly, this also happened to be the location that i finally succumbed to the Deli Belly. After a giuant meal of spring rolls, noodles, pizza and weird curried bread, we returned to the hotel for a chat, only for myself to suddenly feel like i ahd an alien in my stomach. Within a matter of seconds, i went from chatty, cheerful, British fellow to running, sweating, panting man beast barging his way to the nearest toilet. After spending an hour on the loo groaning and twitching like a woman in labour, i finally got over the worst and headed straight to bed. When i awoke, immodium had done its job and i felt fine. Spent the day chilling before our flight to my current location where i sit now, Hanoi, Vietnam. Seems nice so far. Nice and cool, with lots of fun things to do. Just spent the evening eating a meal of fish, noodles, strange salad and peanut sauce stuff. SO GOOD. they cooked it all on the table for us then put it all together and literally placed it in our mouths. So i havnt been complaining.
Anyway, after what is probably the LONGEST post ever, i'm off to bed. Flickr has been vainly trying to upload some new photos, so expect them appearing over the next couple of days. Every now and again, we'll make a couple of posts that don't fit chronologically with these big ones, but they will have a pic attached and a little story for the stuff neither of us have remembered to write about.
Two countries down, nine more to go.
Night night.xx
Friday 20 February 2009
Thursday 19 February 2009
Food glorious food!
After several nights of eating Street Huice flavoured delights, we FINALLY found our sanctuary, this yummy little restaurant on the river. We were so pleased with the nosh we had to take a photograph to commemorate the occasion.
Sadly on another note, ever since we have been in Asia, the results of our eating habits is playing havoc with us. IM a pretty regular guy, but at the moment, im averaging about 6 poos a day. It aint right i tell ya. They're all so unsubstantial as well which just makes it even sadder.
Carbs, where for art thou?
Bhudda Bling
We took a trip to the Standing Bhudda in Bangkok via a lovely Tuk Tuk driver. He was so nice. We were introduced to him by an off duty policeman who was telling us how it was a religious day in Thailand, and the king was in town, so we MUST take a tuk tuk round all the Bhuddist temples. He suggested a 'special' Tuk Tuk with two yellow flags that would ride us everywhere we wanted to go for only 20 Barts. But alas, these Tuk Tuks are hard to come by. Just as we were wallowing in the saddness of never finding one of these Tuk Tuks, suddenly one appears right next to us! Amazing! The nice policeman takes us over, introduces us and insists the driver take us around all the temples for 20 barts. What a deal. And what a nice man. SO, off we trundle, first to here, the Standing Bhudda where we see the Bhuddists offering donations to the big gold guy via throwing pennies in these metal pots. Awesome sound. Then we beging our next journey with our faithful Tuk Tuk driver. Not, as we thought around all the Temples in Bangkok, but instead, around gem factories and dopzens of tailors shops. Cut what is now a long story shorter, he tells us he will not take us anywhere other than tailors shops until we buy something so he gets commision. I tell him to take us home. He drops us at the docks no where near where we live. For 150 barts. The man was a bastard. And so was our policeman.
Tuesday 17 February 2009
Lost in Laos
Thanks to the incredibly awful internet outside of Thailand, it hasnt been the easiest of things to get online and access the blog, but finally! I can! Apologies in advance for worst spelling than normal, adapting to bizarre keyboards is something i have not yet mastered on this trip. Also, this is gonna be a brief over view coz after all the issues we have had trying to upload photos, i actually think i might be in this internet cafe FOREVER.
Anyway, Lots of fun things have happened since the last post. We left Thailand at last, after spending some time in Chang Mai, which was awesome and relaxing, we headed over the boarder into Laos. We stayed in a little place called Chang kong for one night, where we slept by the Mekong in a nice guest house. I treated myself to a foot massage by a scary thai lady shouting "LA LAY LAAAAR" whilst rubbing my foot with such force i think my bones have distintegrated. However, it did feel bloody lovely afterwards. Anyway, crossed the river the next morning, then begun our two day sailing trip down the Mekong River. This is exactly what i think we all needed. The trip with our group ahs been awesome so far, havnt had to worry about a thing, but it has been very busy. 6.30 am starts (Thats earlier than i ever got up last year!) and late nights have taken their toll, plus the immense heat, it was great to spend two days, floating down a river past beautiful scenery to chill out. And it all gave us a lot more time to get to know eachother too which was good. Half way through our first day, we stopped off at this little village in the middle of no where. It was gobsmacking. Im talking mud huts, cows and chickens. Not a TV or lightbulb in sight. Was bonkers! At one point the children swarmed around us, i felt like Ghandi.
After we finished our boat trip, we headed to Luang Prabang for 3 days, and it was AMAZING! Lovely guest house with crazy monks screaming all day and night in the temple opposite, it was a bit more developed here, with coffee shops, selling things like BREAD. OH GOD it was good to eat bread. Jo and I went on a little bike ride round the town for the day which was awesome. Until it got to about 2 in the afternoon and i was sweating so much i think i nearly combusted, so we stopped and got some food. Had a big night out the other night too with our group, aweosme bunch of people these Losty folks. Altho, the next morning was like Mordor. Hangover + Heat = DOOM. But, the perfect cure for that was a jump in a waterfall. My god it was lovely. In the middle of the rain forest we took a trek to this perfect blue waterfall and had an awesome time there. After our last night in LUang yesterday, im now here, where i am right now, in Viang Vieng. A little Backpackers town by a lovely river. Tomorrow calls for Rubber tubing up the river for a bar crawl and lots of swimming. Can;t wait :)
Anyway, in the future, blogs will hopefully be more fun and more frequent as we have the photos sorted now. But i must go, as my balance for using this machine currently stands at 60,000 kip. I have no idea how much that is but it sounds alot.
Cheerio!
(Oh and photos on Facebook are up, expect the rest on Flickr anyday now)
xxx
Anyway, Lots of fun things have happened since the last post. We left Thailand at last, after spending some time in Chang Mai, which was awesome and relaxing, we headed over the boarder into Laos. We stayed in a little place called Chang kong for one night, where we slept by the Mekong in a nice guest house. I treated myself to a foot massage by a scary thai lady shouting "LA LAY LAAAAR" whilst rubbing my foot with such force i think my bones have distintegrated. However, it did feel bloody lovely afterwards. Anyway, crossed the river the next morning, then begun our two day sailing trip down the Mekong River. This is exactly what i think we all needed. The trip with our group ahs been awesome so far, havnt had to worry about a thing, but it has been very busy. 6.30 am starts (Thats earlier than i ever got up last year!) and late nights have taken their toll, plus the immense heat, it was great to spend two days, floating down a river past beautiful scenery to chill out. And it all gave us a lot more time to get to know eachother too which was good. Half way through our first day, we stopped off at this little village in the middle of no where. It was gobsmacking. Im talking mud huts, cows and chickens. Not a TV or lightbulb in sight. Was bonkers! At one point the children swarmed around us, i felt like Ghandi.
After we finished our boat trip, we headed to Luang Prabang for 3 days, and it was AMAZING! Lovely guest house with crazy monks screaming all day and night in the temple opposite, it was a bit more developed here, with coffee shops, selling things like BREAD. OH GOD it was good to eat bread. Jo and I went on a little bike ride round the town for the day which was awesome. Until it got to about 2 in the afternoon and i was sweating so much i think i nearly combusted, so we stopped and got some food. Had a big night out the other night too with our group, aweosme bunch of people these Losty folks. Altho, the next morning was like Mordor. Hangover + Heat = DOOM. But, the perfect cure for that was a jump in a waterfall. My god it was lovely. In the middle of the rain forest we took a trek to this perfect blue waterfall and had an awesome time there. After our last night in LUang yesterday, im now here, where i am right now, in Viang Vieng. A little Backpackers town by a lovely river. Tomorrow calls for Rubber tubing up the river for a bar crawl and lots of swimming. Can;t wait :)
Anyway, in the future, blogs will hopefully be more fun and more frequent as we have the photos sorted now. But i must go, as my balance for using this machine currently stands at 60,000 kip. I have no idea how much that is but it sounds alot.
Cheerio!
(Oh and photos on Facebook are up, expect the rest on Flickr anyday now)
xxx
Wednesday 11 February 2009
Bangkok-a-bye-bye
Well, as you can probably tell my by Jo's latest post, things are much cheerier now on our trip. Thanks to departing Bangkok! Like i said, great city, but you really don't want to stay too long. Its kind of like buttered popcorn. It looks oily and weird, and smells pretty grim, but tastes GREAT. Only once you are half way through a bag you feel like your soul has been deep fried. Anyway, we finally met our group the other night, and what a lovely bunch they are. None of them seem to be "Hi ive only just met you but its clear we are going to be best friends!" potential, but they are all really great and lovely and have made us feel at ease. The best way we have found to describe them, is if we compare them to Lost characters. (In a non racially/personally insulting way of course). First there's Jin and Sun, two lovely people from Canada, but originally from Hong Kong i think. Jin is GREAT at computers, he's retired now but i think he built IBM. Then there's Rose and Bernard. Both are so lovely, very well travelled, intelligent people also from Canada but originally from Devon. Bernard has a PHD in Material Physics (?!). I think he invented the button. Then there's John Lock. Except he is a woman called Debbie. She is a Geologist. She is mysterious and full of wisdom and knows alot about gas. Then there's Charlie, a First Mate from a big ship in the UK. Then we have Sayid. He's a New Yorker, great fun, nice guy who knows alot about money and weed. Shannon comes in the form of three Danish ladies (yum yum!) called Mia, P and Stina. Theyre all lovely, pretty young but up for a party. Our group leader, Ceris is pretty much identicle to Kate. Lovely, funny, worldly wise. Then we have Jo, an Advertising exec from Canada, Jessica a teacher from New York and Zoe, a physio from the UK living in Thailand. They can just be general Losty survivors coz we cant think of any characters to fit them. And i guess that leaves me as Hurley. Typical.
Yesterday afternoon we boarded our sleeper train from Bangkok, and headed on our 13 hours journey to Northern Thailand which is where i am writing from now. Chang Mai to be exact. Its GREAT. Waaaaaay more laid back, lovely people, nice and cool yet still lovely and the city is so much nicer. Found a street FULL of lady boys and 13 year old girls doing naughty things tonight, but apart from that, its Bhuddist Central. So many temples EVERYWHERE. Theyre all so beautiful. If this computer was playing up so much, i would upload my SQUILLION photos of gold bhudda statues that i have been taking with my new lens (it makes me look like a great photographer ^_^ ) Oh yeah, Sleeper train. It was good! Cozy, fun and pretty easy to sleep on. We ate our dinner, then at about 10, down came the bunk beds and we all jumped in. Everyone was asleep straight away, i decided to stay up and write my journal. Bad idea. A cockraoch visited me by climbing up a seat belt next to my head. So i disposed of him as far as possible (Flicked him onto someone elses bed down the corridor), then what do you know it, ten minutes later, an even BIGGER one appear next to my pillow. So, i scrunch him and up chuck him away, pop a couple of vallium then fall asleep praying im too out of it to even notice them crawling up my nose. And it worked! Woke up bright and bushy taioled for our adventure that Jo spoke about previously. GREAT GREAT fun riding the elephants. Obviously, it was a bit cruel, but our guy was mental, spraying us with his snot hose everytime he didnt get a bannana, and smashing through the trees like a rhino on speed. He was honestly the Elephant from the Simpsons, Stampy. After that, we had our great rafting adventure. Awesome fun. Zooming down a river, going through rapids whilst trying to stay afloat a bunch of bamboo trunks held together with string! We didnt even have a life jacket! ONce my mass got fully loaded onto the boat, it wasnt long before i snapped a string making it much harder for everyone to stay afloat. Brilliant fun though. When Jo got qiped out by a fallen tree, i felt sorry for her for about a minute, then it was just too funny watching her zoom down the rapids behind her. I pulled her to safety though so she was ok ^_^. Finally, ended the day (After showing 24 hours of filth and elephant snot from ourselves) by visiting a temple up on a mountain and watched some monks chant. It was beautiful. Just amazing. I'll let the photo's speak for themselves when i can upload them. Same goes for the Reclining Bhudda in Bangkok, probably the most awesome thing i have set my eyes on in a very long time.
Anyway, better go, this is gonna cost me a squillion bucks the amount of time ive been on here. Off to Laos tomorrow, bye bye Thailand! Iinternet could be a mission so will update when we can. Cheerio!xx
Yesterday afternoon we boarded our sleeper train from Bangkok, and headed on our 13 hours journey to Northern Thailand which is where i am writing from now. Chang Mai to be exact. Its GREAT. Waaaaaay more laid back, lovely people, nice and cool yet still lovely and the city is so much nicer. Found a street FULL of lady boys and 13 year old girls doing naughty things tonight, but apart from that, its Bhuddist Central. So many temples EVERYWHERE. Theyre all so beautiful. If this computer was playing up so much, i would upload my SQUILLION photos of gold bhudda statues that i have been taking with my new lens (it makes me look like a great photographer ^_^ ) Oh yeah, Sleeper train. It was good! Cozy, fun and pretty easy to sleep on. We ate our dinner, then at about 10, down came the bunk beds and we all jumped in. Everyone was asleep straight away, i decided to stay up and write my journal. Bad idea. A cockraoch visited me by climbing up a seat belt next to my head. So i disposed of him as far as possible (Flicked him onto someone elses bed down the corridor), then what do you know it, ten minutes later, an even BIGGER one appear next to my pillow. So, i scrunch him and up chuck him away, pop a couple of vallium then fall asleep praying im too out of it to even notice them crawling up my nose. And it worked! Woke up bright and bushy taioled for our adventure that Jo spoke about previously. GREAT GREAT fun riding the elephants. Obviously, it was a bit cruel, but our guy was mental, spraying us with his snot hose everytime he didnt get a bannana, and smashing through the trees like a rhino on speed. He was honestly the Elephant from the Simpsons, Stampy. After that, we had our great rafting adventure. Awesome fun. Zooming down a river, going through rapids whilst trying to stay afloat a bunch of bamboo trunks held together with string! We didnt even have a life jacket! ONce my mass got fully loaded onto the boat, it wasnt long before i snapped a string making it much harder for everyone to stay afloat. Brilliant fun though. When Jo got qiped out by a fallen tree, i felt sorry for her for about a minute, then it was just too funny watching her zoom down the rapids behind her. I pulled her to safety though so she was ok ^_^. Finally, ended the day (After showing 24 hours of filth and elephant snot from ourselves) by visiting a temple up on a mountain and watched some monks chant. It was beautiful. Just amazing. I'll let the photo's speak for themselves when i can upload them. Same goes for the Reclining Bhudda in Bangkok, probably the most awesome thing i have set my eyes on in a very long time.
Anyway, better go, this is gonna cost me a squillion bucks the amount of time ive been on here. Off to Laos tomorrow, bye bye Thailand! Iinternet could be a mission so will update when we can. Cheerio!xx
Chang Mei
We are currently in Chang Mei which is so much nicer than Bangkok...its much of the same but on a more relaxed level. We were only asked if we wanted to see a ping pong show once!!!
Today we went on an elephant ride which was great fun. Chris and I shared an elephant whose driver(?!) was hugely stoned which explained why our elephant kept walking off the tracks and tearing up anything in its sight with its trunk. We fed it bananas along the way which started out as a pleasant experience until we ran out of bananas and this huge trunk would suddenly become our view and blast elephant breath, snot and god knows what else! Think jurassic park!
Next we went on a bamboo raft down a river which was so so relaxing. I decided to stand up the whole way which was a big mistake as being at the back of the raft I took the brunt of every rock we hit. I kept my balance most the way until I heard Chris shout 'Oh God!' and before I knew it we were headed for the foliage on the bank where there was the hugest tree branch in front of me. I tried to be a jungle Jane and jump over it but realised that this was highly unlikely so instead got smacked by this log right into the water. Totally lost my sunglasses and as I started to look for them it dawned on me that I was stuck in the river while the raft was moving further away!! I grabbed a big boulder and clung on for dear life watching everyone laughing at me. I tried to stand up but the current was so strong it was impossible so I had to let go and I was swept down the river smashing my knees and bum on the rocks until I got back to the raft. It was really funny but now I have a huge bruise on my knee as well as hundreds of ant bites. I actually look like I have rabies!! By the end of the ride our raft was literally falling to pieces so it was really difficult to balance which, is when Chris took a slip! He did not fall in to the river but right on his back in the middle of the raft!!! So so funny!
All in all it has been a great relaxing day. Every bit of food I ate today was lovely and I have stopped taking my malaria tablets so was not sick. Yeah!! Tomorrow we leave ChangMei as we begin our adventure to Laos and I cant wait. We have to travel on a bus for 5 hours but after that we spend 2 days on a boat which sounds like a lot of fun. So for now its good bye to Thailand!! x
Today we went on an elephant ride which was great fun. Chris and I shared an elephant whose driver(?!) was hugely stoned which explained why our elephant kept walking off the tracks and tearing up anything in its sight with its trunk. We fed it bananas along the way which started out as a pleasant experience until we ran out of bananas and this huge trunk would suddenly become our view and blast elephant breath, snot and god knows what else! Think jurassic park!
Next we went on a bamboo raft down a river which was so so relaxing. I decided to stand up the whole way which was a big mistake as being at the back of the raft I took the brunt of every rock we hit. I kept my balance most the way until I heard Chris shout 'Oh God!' and before I knew it we were headed for the foliage on the bank where there was the hugest tree branch in front of me. I tried to be a jungle Jane and jump over it but realised that this was highly unlikely so instead got smacked by this log right into the water. Totally lost my sunglasses and as I started to look for them it dawned on me that I was stuck in the river while the raft was moving further away!! I grabbed a big boulder and clung on for dear life watching everyone laughing at me. I tried to stand up but the current was so strong it was impossible so I had to let go and I was swept down the river smashing my knees and bum on the rocks until I got back to the raft. It was really funny but now I have a huge bruise on my knee as well as hundreds of ant bites. I actually look like I have rabies!! By the end of the ride our raft was literally falling to pieces so it was really difficult to balance which, is when Chris took a slip! He did not fall in to the river but right on his back in the middle of the raft!!! So so funny!
All in all it has been a great relaxing day. Every bit of food I ate today was lovely and I have stopped taking my malaria tablets so was not sick. Yeah!! Tomorrow we leave ChangMei as we begin our adventure to Laos and I cant wait. We have to travel on a bus for 5 hours but after that we spend 2 days on a boat which sounds like a lot of fun. So for now its good bye to Thailand!! x
Sunday 8 February 2009
On the move again...
Just a quick one today, as we are both in the worst of moods! Had to repack our back packs today for the move to a new hotel before our trek to Chang Mai on the over night train (13 hours. Oh dear god). It was HELL repacking. We seem to have bought so much unecessary stuff. Its crazy. We already felt like we have hardly bought anything. And either we have teeny tiny back packs or are just morons but it was hell repacking. Massively demoralising realising we will be doing this non stop for the next 6 months, carrying our lives around on our backs. Its not fun. There will be two outcomes to this situation. We will become expert packers, putting everything in its rightful place each and everytime. Or we will just throw all of our stuff away and live like hermits. At the moment, im seeing the latter come into fruition.
Anyway, lovely lovely day yesterday. Made friends with two strange old men who had arrived in Bangkok. Nice guys. One was like Robert Downey Jr, still on the drugs tho. Spent the afternoon drinking with them, then we went for a boat ride around Bangkok, amazing. Altho we did think rape/murder was on the cards at some points as it was just me and jo in the boat, but its turned out awesome. AND best news, we FINALLY had an amazing meal! Beautiful little restaurant covered in fairy lights on the river that served us Thai food that DIDNT taste like any of the Street Juice. And loads of it was covered in satay sauce. Yum!
Anyway, today, if we can get over our depression, and the fact that we have just discovered Jo is not taking the Malaria tablets well (She was sick again today. Its not fun) we are going to visit the temple then meet with our group tonight for the beginning of our 2 week trek. More than ANYTHING we are praying our group are good fun. But by the way our luck has gone so far, they are more than likely to be foreign/sex tourists/idiotic morons/All of above. Oh well. Wish us luck!
xx
Anyway, lovely lovely day yesterday. Made friends with two strange old men who had arrived in Bangkok. Nice guys. One was like Robert Downey Jr, still on the drugs tho. Spent the afternoon drinking with them, then we went for a boat ride around Bangkok, amazing. Altho we did think rape/murder was on the cards at some points as it was just me and jo in the boat, but its turned out awesome. AND best news, we FINALLY had an amazing meal! Beautiful little restaurant covered in fairy lights on the river that served us Thai food that DIDNT taste like any of the Street Juice. And loads of it was covered in satay sauce. Yum!
Anyway, today, if we can get over our depression, and the fact that we have just discovered Jo is not taking the Malaria tablets well (She was sick again today. Its not fun) we are going to visit the temple then meet with our group tonight for the beginning of our 2 week trek. More than ANYTHING we are praying our group are good fun. But by the way our luck has gone so far, they are more than likely to be foreign/sex tourists/idiotic morons/All of above. Oh well. Wish us luck!
xx
Saturday 7 February 2009
**DISCLAMIER**
Yes, the spelling (Mostly mine) is bad but we only have 15 minute intervals to write these things! So apologies for the pedantic and grammatically anal out there.x
I have been ravaged with sickness and had my feet bitten to oblivion by some angry ants, so far this trip is not going my way!!! I think I am experiencing the bitter sweet of having everything going to plan before I left England and now I am in a far away land everything is falling apart! Ok, so its really not that bad but I was sick again today which we have concluded is due to the fact that I keep taking my tablets on an empty stomach. (I'm sure Chris has mentioned how bad the food is, particuarly with the 'Street Juice' flavourings!!) Either that or I am having really bad side affects to my malaria tablets which would be a disaster as I would have to choose between spending a fortune on another 75 tablets or risking throwing up every day for the next 2 months!!
We have not been to a 'Ping pong' show yet although as you know we get asked about ten times a day if we want to visit them. Chris has his own tactic of getting rid of them by saying that he already has his own private show...me! The thought just terrifies me! The people are all lovely though, very weird and wonderful. (Karen, we saw Yo Stank Bitch herself sitting on a motorbike fiddling with her hair, swinging her legs, pouting like a fish and boobs falling out of her top...hillarious!!!) Chris really scared me on our first night when we were sat at a bar having a drink, by telling me smeagol was crawling on the floor and going to grab my ankles!! I was terrified and tried to hide my feet but it was a poor beggar with no limbs manouvering himself through the seats...pretty shocking. But im sure we will experience worse things x
We have not been to a 'Ping pong' show yet although as you know we get asked about ten times a day if we want to visit them. Chris has his own tactic of getting rid of them by saying that he already has his own private show...me! The thought just terrifies me! The people are all lovely though, very weird and wonderful. (Karen, we saw Yo Stank Bitch herself sitting on a motorbike fiddling with her hair, swinging her legs, pouting like a fish and boobs falling out of her top...hillarious!!!) Chris really scared me on our first night when we were sat at a bar having a drink, by telling me smeagol was crawling on the floor and going to grab my ankles!! I was terrified and tried to hide my feet but it was a poor beggar with no limbs manouvering himself through the seats...pretty shocking. But im sure we will experience worse things x
My kingdom for a Sandwich!
Hi, Chris again. Well, the mission for a new hotel failed tragically. But its pretty much entirely of our own doing. We decided, once Jo returned from the bed, that besides the fact we fell like we are in an episode of Porridge whenever we are in our room, its actually not that bad. Well, the room is dark, small, with a painted on window, but its clean, and the bed is fricking comfy and the cold shower/hose we use to wash ourselves with is strangely refreshing, so save trudging the dark streets of Bagkok, we are gonna stick around in the Sawadee Khao San. However, upon roaming the streets tonight, we stumbled across another hotel down the road next to a restuarant we went to (Indian place, their Korma is NOT how i remember it. Does Korma have tomoatoes and peas in?!) and this hotel, has a roof top swimming pool. And a blacnony in every roomm. And cable TV. And air con. And a fridge. And hot water. And no painted on windows. And is HALF THE FRICKING PRICE of our our place. This made us want to cry somewhat. However, on the sad walk home, mysel and Jo discussed the merits of our gaff, and how, ya know, it has character and has made our first visit to Bangkok a funny one. then we sat downstairs at the bar/shed next to the recpetion desk, grabbed a bottle of pepsi, then watched with saddness as two cockraoches fought over a piece of spit on the floor in front of us. And it wasnt until another of their little buddies clambered up my leg, (and i squeeled) that i started thinking, bollocks. We shant be staying here again. So, as lovely as our stay has been, its rooftop swimming pools should we ever come back to this godforesaken city.
Dont get me wrong, Bangkok is a strange and wonderful place certainly worth visiting of what we have seen so far. Every step you take, someone is in your face asking if you want TAXi or TUK TUK or my favourite, 'YOU WANT PING PONG? *POPPING SOUND*'. The best is when a middle aged sweating family from Bolton were walking in front of us, with their faces already stricken with horror and confusion, and one of these guys walks along with them backwards, facing them, then he says 'EY I TAKE YOU PING PONG YES?' then he lowers his hand to the mothers groin with a grabbing motion and makes popping sounds as though she herself is emitting the white balls of pleasure through her garments. They didnt find this funny. We did tho. The other thing about taking a stroll in Bangkok is the smells. Oh god. The smells. One step stinks of aromatherapy. The next is fried eggs. The next is PURE SEWAGE, and the final one, the worst one, is like, rotten eggs being baked over a dead sloth. Just the worst smell ever. (It pretty much beats my number one spot - a dried, black egg i found in a river when i was 12 that exploded on me emitting a foul smelling juice) Every day we walk through the markets, past the street food, it always invloves us taking a quick jog every couplke of steps with our faces turning blue as we try to avoid the foul smells. I mean some of the street food is good, but osme of it is oh so bad. Its almost like the stuff they eat in post=apocalyptic films, like rat and babies. Just yuk yuk yuk. The saddest response to these smells however, is the affect it has had one our taste buds. I dont think i ever have toi worry about gaining weight whilst im here. every meal we have been to, has tasted, ever so slightly of street juice (Our now official name for these tremendous fragrances) Its such a shame. I LOVE Thai food. Like last night for example - a pile of Butterlfy shrimp. Looks delicious. Coated in cocunut batter. But i eat it, and the smell emitting from these succulant morsels smell of Street Juice number 3 - Sugary urine. Its so sad. I had to leave them. Tonight we had a curry, and pretty much all the Street Juice flavours were there. I even had a poit of strawberrys at a market today, and there was even a slight whiff of it. I dont know what it is. maybe its the water? Or the oil they use, or the fat or quality of meat. But i gotta say. Im dying for a sandwich.
Anyway, enough of my moaning. Im sure at some point i was saying how great i thought Bangkok was? And its true, i do think its great. its a strange, flourescenbt city where everything is for sale and you are never short of a place to Party. Today we went to Chatachak (sp?) market, a HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE weekend market for the locals, and it was fantastic. Not a Brit in sight. It was just the biggest thing ive ever seen. Like Camden Market, but hot and so much bigger with not a goth in sight. The clothes were amazing. So far, the clothes we had seen have been on Koah San Road, and consisted of t shirts saying things like "ME ARE YOU BEST GIRLFRIEND IN THE YEAR" and "I AM NOT VIRGIN, SEX IS GOOD" so when we saw the awesome clothes in this market, it was slightly cruel. Thai people have wicked dress sense. its like Japanese but a bit more suited and booted. Amazing shoes, lovely shorts, wicked shirts, skinny jeans etc. I was very jealous and sad becuase if i even attempted to dress in my usual attire over here, i would be nothing but a pool of fat and bones on the floor within minutes. I mean, they dont have a drop of sweat on them. Plus, we cant even buy it to take with us, becuase i have a feeling when we are in the middle of the jungle looking for some fire wood, a skinny tie, flannel shirt and black winkle pickers will be the first to go. Shame. Altho i did buy some things. Two t shirts for 3 quid?! Eeermazin! Anyway, tomorrow should be fun, chilling out and going for a wander round Chinatown, then off to the Temples on Sunday. Cant bloody wait.
Anyway, must go, i can smell Street Juice number 2 - Boiled fish.
x
Dont get me wrong, Bangkok is a strange and wonderful place certainly worth visiting of what we have seen so far. Every step you take, someone is in your face asking if you want TAXi or TUK TUK or my favourite, 'YOU WANT PING PONG? *POPPING SOUND*'. The best is when a middle aged sweating family from Bolton were walking in front of us, with their faces already stricken with horror and confusion, and one of these guys walks along with them backwards, facing them, then he says 'EY I TAKE YOU PING PONG YES?' then he lowers his hand to the mothers groin with a grabbing motion and makes popping sounds as though she herself is emitting the white balls of pleasure through her garments. They didnt find this funny. We did tho. The other thing about taking a stroll in Bangkok is the smells. Oh god. The smells. One step stinks of aromatherapy. The next is fried eggs. The next is PURE SEWAGE, and the final one, the worst one, is like, rotten eggs being baked over a dead sloth. Just the worst smell ever. (It pretty much beats my number one spot - a dried, black egg i found in a river when i was 12 that exploded on me emitting a foul smelling juice) Every day we walk through the markets, past the street food, it always invloves us taking a quick jog every couplke of steps with our faces turning blue as we try to avoid the foul smells. I mean some of the street food is good, but osme of it is oh so bad. Its almost like the stuff they eat in post=apocalyptic films, like rat and babies. Just yuk yuk yuk. The saddest response to these smells however, is the affect it has had one our taste buds. I dont think i ever have toi worry about gaining weight whilst im here. every meal we have been to, has tasted, ever so slightly of street juice (Our now official name for these tremendous fragrances) Its such a shame. I LOVE Thai food. Like last night for example - a pile of Butterlfy shrimp. Looks delicious. Coated in cocunut batter. But i eat it, and the smell emitting from these succulant morsels smell of Street Juice number 3 - Sugary urine. Its so sad. I had to leave them. Tonight we had a curry, and pretty much all the Street Juice flavours were there. I even had a poit of strawberrys at a market today, and there was even a slight whiff of it. I dont know what it is. maybe its the water? Or the oil they use, or the fat or quality of meat. But i gotta say. Im dying for a sandwich.
Anyway, enough of my moaning. Im sure at some point i was saying how great i thought Bangkok was? And its true, i do think its great. its a strange, flourescenbt city where everything is for sale and you are never short of a place to Party. Today we went to Chatachak (sp?) market, a HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE weekend market for the locals, and it was fantastic. Not a Brit in sight. It was just the biggest thing ive ever seen. Like Camden Market, but hot and so much bigger with not a goth in sight. The clothes were amazing. So far, the clothes we had seen have been on Koah San Road, and consisted of t shirts saying things like "ME ARE YOU BEST GIRLFRIEND IN THE YEAR" and "I AM NOT VIRGIN, SEX IS GOOD" so when we saw the awesome clothes in this market, it was slightly cruel. Thai people have wicked dress sense. its like Japanese but a bit more suited and booted. Amazing shoes, lovely shorts, wicked shirts, skinny jeans etc. I was very jealous and sad becuase if i even attempted to dress in my usual attire over here, i would be nothing but a pool of fat and bones on the floor within minutes. I mean, they dont have a drop of sweat on them. Plus, we cant even buy it to take with us, becuase i have a feeling when we are in the middle of the jungle looking for some fire wood, a skinny tie, flannel shirt and black winkle pickers will be the first to go. Shame. Altho i did buy some things. Two t shirts for 3 quid?! Eeermazin! Anyway, tomorrow should be fun, chilling out and going for a wander round Chinatown, then off to the Temples on Sunday. Cant bloody wait.
Anyway, must go, i can smell Street Juice number 2 - Boiled fish.
x
Friday 6 February 2009
I'm ok!
Poor Chris has spent half the day on his own, but luckily I have recovered from my weird sickness and am on my feet once more! Feeling a bit delicate but nothing that a plate of chips and some bottled water can sort out!! Bye! xxx Jo xxx
Marshmellow Massage Faces
Not sure what these people have on their faces, but im pretty sure its marshmellow.
Street food
Yum! God knws what it is but it smelt good. Although, some of it looks vile. Saw a person selling boiled fish. Just a big bowl of steaming boiled fish. I very nearly puked into it.
Thursday 5 February 2009
Bangkok-a-go-go
Chris here. Jo is upstairs spending our first day in this strange land being sick. Thankfully, it’s just from a bad headache, and not from the dreaded squits.
So we have finally arrived. It has begun. The flight was pretty good. No lovely Thai ladies serving us though, or delicious food. It was like a poor mans Virgin Flight. These tales of Quantas being the be all and end all of sky travel are widely exaggerated. Good films though, had about a million to choose form, including The Fugitive, Dirty Harry and Little Miss Sunshine, so I was happy! Managed to get to the airport, and get through immigration without a hitch too so that was nice. Found it very hard to say goodbye to everyone in London though. I'm such a girl and a mommy’s boy. And, whilst I’m on the subject of me being a wimp, I’ll be honest; this travelling malarkey is tough at first! I'm trying to embrace the excitement of being in this new strange place, but I’m honestly just freaking out a bit. Its not so much Thailand and the madness that is Bangkok, it's mostly just the fact my old life has gone. I have to keep all my pants and clothes squished together in a tiny bag. I can't brush my teeth from the tap or I’ll spend several days needing a nappy. I have to ask for drinks without ice cubes. And I CAN'T STOP SWEATING (ok not much of a change there I guess). I just need to chill out, and embrace this new existence for a while. But I’ll be honest; I’m missing my straightners, DVD and iPod! Anyway, enough of my moaning about that, I guess it will get a lot easier; I mean it is only the first day.
So, about our first day. We arrived last night at about 5pm, after spending a mini cab ride from the airport with a group of 17 year old girls who made us feel infinitely old as they talked about going to uni and saying the words 'yeah, so' a lot, we got dropped off down a street that looked as though its come straight from the film 'The Beach' (Yes I know Cliché, but it really does.) We managed to get to our hotel, amidst the tiny allies (Or Soi as they call them here - Yes I have been reading my Lonely Planet Guide) only to be told the air con is broke. At this point I nearly start crying as the miniature walk from the cab to the reception desk has already caused my clothes to start shrinking due to the amoutn of sweat im producing. So we get told we have been upgraded to another hotel down the road. Off we trundle through the streets, past strange men on the floor begging, lots of stalls selling belts, roaming stray cats, and a kiosk selling something which I honestly think was brown, pickled eggs (Oh god I gagged) finally we reach our new hotel. It loosk almost identicle as the last, and we are quickly escorted to our room. upon entry, it actually looks like a prison cell. Double bed, TV (literally on the bed) tiny desk, MASSIVE fridge, and a bathroom. We have two windows. One opens onto a cupboard with no natural light. The other is painted on the wall above our bed. At this point, I start to freak. Then we look at the shower. It has cold water only, and is electrical, with the wires pleasantly poking out of the wall. Also to our discovery this morning, it's actually just a hose. Not a shower. The head just pops off as soon as the water starts to run. Lovely. So, on this morning, as Jo lies in bed trying to get over a headache and some sickyness, we are on the hunt for a new hotel. This is our mission. I only hope we can succeed.
Love you and miss you all.x
Wednesday 4 February 2009
Sail away...Sail away...
As a symbolic gesture of my departure, my friends lit a chinese lantern and let it fly away. Im not sure if this is a healthy gesture - a burning symbol of myself flying, scorched into the cold, dark sky.
Either way, it was beautiful and lovely.
THE ROUTE
FEB 5th - BANGKOK, THAILAND
Two/three months in Asia over all, starting in Bangkok, Thailand, and making our way up through LAOS, then into VIETNAM, and then down into CAMBODIA, then down through MALAYSIA, and ending up in SINGAPORE.
APRIL 5th - CAIRNS, AUSTRALIA
Two months or so in OZ, travelling down the East Coast, starting at CAIRNS for some scuba diving on the Barrier Reef (Jaws anyone?), then making our way down to FRASER ISLAND, then BRISBANE and eventually ending up in SYDNEY to stay with a wonderful person called Gub.
JUNE 5th - CHRISTCHURCH, NEW ZEALAND
Will spend two weeks traveling from Christchurch on the South Island in a campervan (Woo!), then we head up to the NORTH ISLAND where we'll spend another two weeks touring around, finally flying out of AUCKLAND.
JULY 6th - NADI, FIJI
Lazing around FIJI for about two weeks. This, i should imagine will mostly consist of paradise. Im hoping it will be anyway.
JULY 20th - LA, USA
Hurrah! "I want to be in Amerrrricah!" We arrive in the states and, hopefully, money permitting, shall be staying for about a month. A couple of nights in LA, then we head to SAN FRANCISCO and spend about a week there. Then, it's north to SEATTLE for another week or so, then continuing further north, we head into Canada and VANCOUVER, where hopefully we catch a train over to TORONTO, and then finally, after staying a few days, we wipe our tears away, and fly out of NEW YORK back home to good ol' Blighty. Then, as oddly as this feels now leaving the UK, it will even more oddly, be all over.
FEB 5th - BANGKOK, THAILAND
Two/three months in Asia over all, starting in Bangkok, Thailand, and making our way up through LAOS, then into VIETNAM, and then down into CAMBODIA, then down through MALAYSIA, and ending up in SINGAPORE.
APRIL 5th - CAIRNS, AUSTRALIA
Two months or so in OZ, travelling down the East Coast, starting at CAIRNS for some scuba diving on the Barrier Reef (Jaws anyone?), then making our way down to FRASER ISLAND, then BRISBANE and eventually ending up in SYDNEY to stay with a wonderful person called Gub.
JUNE 5th - CHRISTCHURCH, NEW ZEALAND
Will spend two weeks traveling from Christchurch on the South Island in a campervan (Woo!), then we head up to the NORTH ISLAND where we'll spend another two weeks touring around, finally flying out of AUCKLAND.
JULY 6th - NADI, FIJI
Lazing around FIJI for about two weeks. This, i should imagine will mostly consist of paradise. Im hoping it will be anyway.
JULY 20th - LA, USA
Hurrah! "I want to be in Amerrrricah!" We arrive in the states and, hopefully, money permitting, shall be staying for about a month. A couple of nights in LA, then we head to SAN FRANCISCO and spend about a week there. Then, it's north to SEATTLE for another week or so, then continuing further north, we head into Canada and VANCOUVER, where hopefully we catch a train over to TORONTO, and then finally, after staying a few days, we wipe our tears away, and fly out of NEW YORK back home to good ol' Blighty. Then, as oddly as this feels now leaving the UK, it will even more oddly, be all over.
Tuesday 3 February 2009
OHGODWHATAREWEDOING?
First blog post. Should be full of existencial musings, and my fears and dreams of what can be achieved by venturing off into the world for 6 months. But i havnt got time for that. Nope. I have a cold. And a back pack to fill with useless parafanalia given to be by over protective parents (Four cans of bug repellant? Really? One of them also says it keeps Komodo Dragons at bay as a side effect. Thank god for that then.) So, i really have to get on. Oh and did i mention i have a horrific cold and it looks like this (above) outside?
So, if you want to follow what happens whilst myself and my pal Jo travel the world, come to this site, have a gander, click on the links to the right there for photos on Flickr, Vids on Vimeo and rants and crys for help/horror on Twitter.
Right then...here we go i guess...Bon Voyage, Hello world! *GULP!*
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